Scout’s take over

Hi two legged friends,

It’s me Scout. I am taking over the blog today.  Because I know you have all heard a lot about me so Laura and I thought it was time that you hear from me.  We’ve been an official working team for almost 5 months now and I got a great new home out of the deal.  I really like it here. I have met so many nice people and there are kids around almost every day.  Kids are good at pets and snuggles and throwing toys,  Kids are my people.  I’ve got a new dog friend ,Molly, who lives with us. We are great buddies but she never wants to play when I want to play.  She usually wants to play when I am napping. She tries to boss me around and because I am a very chill dude I let her.  I spent almost all of my first two years in all kinds of training to find out if I would like and be good at the service dog life because it’s not for every dog.  But its the perfect life for me . One of the things I’ve noticed is that everyone here seems to be amazed at how well mannered and focused I am but they really shouldn’t be because I work at it and Laura makes sure we practice almost every day.  I love to show off my skills. I can pick up all the things she drops. She’s always patient with me and that helps a ton when I have to pick up something new.  I can open and close all the drawers and the doors. I like closing things so much that sometimes I do it without being asked.( and maybe sometimes before she’s ready)  Doors and drawers make this great crash noise when they are closed. I can push buttons to open doors .for us to walk through. I do all kinds of things to help Laura through her day but my most favorite task is helping her take off her shoes and socks.  It can be difficult for her to get her shoes off in places like a medical office or a fitting room so I have become a pro at helping out.  It’s a lot of steps to remember.  First I grab her sneaker in my mouth and yank it all the way off.  (She starts it for me because she’s cool like that.). Then I drop the sneaker on the floor and help her with her socks.  This is a two cue process first I have to “take it” (the sock )in my my mouth and then I have to “pull” it off.  When I realized that it was helpful if I picked up the sock and put it in the laundry basket I started to do that without being asked.  She thinks I’m a genius but it wasn’t very hard to figure it out. So it’s always  a treat party when I do this particular task. One of the things I learned pretty fast is that bending over and standing up can be really hard for her so the more I pick up things the more energy she has and the more time she can spend playing with me.  So it works out pretty well this rhythm we have.
 When I came to live here Laura and I didn’t know each other as well as we do now but these days I keep all her secrets and she keeps mine. I’m going to tell you some of my secrets because we’re friends now and I’m sure you’ll keep them for me too.  First and maybe most important I really like to be outside.  Laura and I walk lots of places and I really enjoy all of my walks.   I love to lay in the sun until  I’m panting so hard it makes Laura  crazy. But I do not like bugs.  I don’t like them to be near me and I NEVER want them to land on me. (Molly eats bugs I think that’s gross!!!)   I like to have someone hold my chewy bone when I chew on it. It helps me get just the right angle. I could play fetch all day everyday and never ever get bored.  I am not a huge fan of being groomed I know it’s something that has to be done so I try to be tolerant and patient ... but really I prefer my fur to fall off naturally I see no need for a  brush,  And nail trimming is absolutely terrible.  I am patient but it is annoying. Human’s seem to insist on personal grooming way too often.  When I’m not working I like to bark at other dogs and cats and stalk squirrels and birds. But large birds kind of freak me out.  I have great tracking abilities but I don’t think the life a hunting dog is for me.  My most favorite high power treat  ( a high power treat is something that dogs find irresistible) is toast.  I mean I like hot dogs and chicken but toast is my very favorite along with anything peanut butter based. Occasionally I get an ice cube if it’s really warm out but I only like those until I get brain freeze and then I kind of loose interest.  Smaller ice cube trays would be ideal.  I like my own bed but Laura’s is better.  
     We’ve been all over together. I like riding the bus. The drivers are super nice and some of them carry treats.  I’ve been to many stores. A few restaurants, lots of medical appointments.  (Laura wants me to point out we are now done with those until September)  Libraries a car repair shop, coffee shops  schools and lots and lots of pt sessions. The physical therapist has a ball just for me   Soon we are going on a little vacation together. I am excited about all the new places I’ll get to check out. We are a vey busy pair and I kind of like it that way. I always get a lot of attention when we go places and  sometimes I even get a few extra belly rubs.   On  Sunday’s we  both try to have an off day. Because rest is important too.  Here’s some things to know if you see us out and about.  When. I am working I move very slowly.  Because this is what works best for my partner.  I’m not sick or hurt. It’s how I can best help her. She takes super good care of me I’m not to hot or too cold.  She makes sure I’m comfortable first and always.  When we aren’t moving I see that as an opportunity to lay down and nap.  One of my friends calls me puddle because any time I get the chance I like to sprawl out on the floor  \and I am not subtle about it. But I’m always watching for cues and ready for the next time I’m needed.   When I’m not working other animals make me super excited and my bark is loud but I love new friends so if you want to please stop and say hello.   Well it’s time for my walk and then my dinner but if this goes well I’ll probably stop by and write again.
Thanks for being so interested in me and what service dog life is like . 💚🐾

We added some pictures.  1 me showing off my skills at the outlets 2 Me enjoying the fireworks.  Everyone says its strange but I really liked watching them. 3 is Just me being goofy

This will probably make some people uncomfortable.

Hello my friends.

Today I thought we’d tackle something that will probably make some of you uncomfortable but please don’t be. My aim with my blog and social media accounts is to bring out the parts of disability life that many people don’t think about. I aim to give you a glimpse into my life and my story but it is just that my story.  I don’t  claim to know everyone’s experience but I do have many friends who are also living lives with disabilities or are close to someone who is and there are some things that many of my friends  experience along with me  and it’s really important to me that we talk about those things.  Even though not everyone wants to hear about it.  So now let’s get to it shall we.  If you read my blog at all you’ll know I try to cover many issues affected by disability.  I am a woman in my mid 40’s with cerebral palsy.  This is what I know.  My disability informs who I am.  It impacts every decision I make.  There is no “overcoming” the fact that I have it.  One of the things that drives me nuts about well meaning supposedly inspirational stories on the news or social media especially this time of year (wedding, prom, and graduation season) are the ridiculous titles that exclaim how this person “overcame” their disabilities or illness and still tries to be “normal” because they walked across the stage using crutches or went to prom even though they may have had to do that using a wheelchair.  I’ve rolled my eyes so many times it’s almost a reflex at this point.  I’ve talked about inspiration porn at length on my blog and on social media everywhere.  I could probably write a book on my experiences with it by itself but that’s for another day and another post.  If you haven’t heard the term inspiration porn before I  urge you to google.Stella Young and her ted talk.  It’s fabulous.  Plus at least in the beginning of her talk you’ll get a pretty good example of an audience who doesn’t know quite how to react to what she is saying.  You can almost here the room collectively saying oh hey that’s funny., but is it wrong and mean if we laugh.  When I  write about or discuss my experiences with people especially people who I’m not particularly close with, they often have that same sort of reaction.

    I’m used to it ,but if the person recovers quickly and learns from our conversations we can move on to the stuff that really matters like how do they take their coffee.  Since I’ve had the blog and several public social media profiles I’ve gotten many comments mostly in the form of emails  or messages..Most of those messages are kind and amazing or tell me that they have learned something.  Yay! But I also get messages informing me that they don’t think I’m disabled.  And then they usually give me a reason based on what their idea of what it means to be disabled.  For example, “Who types for you?” Handicapped people can’t type.”  Because I’m too positive. “I’ve never met a disabled person who didn’t want to be  normal” “I don’t think you are special needs because you don’t  talk or write about your struggle enough.”  “I’m going to stop following you because you give people false hope”  I don’t want you to think dear readers that this is strictly a nameless faceless internet troll who gets their kicks from saying weird things that they’d never say in face to face because it happens other places too  Fortunately Scout takes a lot of the focus off me in public because he is awesome and  most people are more interested in him then in my particulars. But it has brought up something I hadn’t entirely expected. Even though he is not my first service dog it still surprises me when I hear     “Are you sure that’s a “real helping dog?  You don’t look handicapped enough to have that dog.”  Which led to this entire story about how they knew somebody who knew someone who had a helping dog but that person  was really handicapped and couldn’t walk (lots of details not much substance). The person in the coffee shop who demanded that I make Scout show what he could do because they had never heard of anything other then a guide dog. They actually accused me of lying because they were sure that a mobility dog (which I’ve started saying because he isn’t a guide dog. Technically a mobility isn’t right it’s more descriptive ) wasn’t a thing.  The person standing outside the local store who I didn’t notice and wasn’t speaking with until they said “ I hope you don’t expect people  to let you take that dog in with you..  People have allergies you know.” So yeah, it’s become a pretty consistent thought in my head that for some people I’m not disabled enough to be an authority on  the experience of living with my cerebral palsy. But these same  befuddled people want me to be sure and understand I an “special needs” and blessed (the whole calling me special needs deserves its own post too)  Even so I just cannot expect the world to help me. (Strangely I believe in a higher power that wishes me to help others ... but I guess that’s not their creator)  Then these people wait to see what inspiring tale I’ll tell them or figure in that they can repeat at dinner that night.
       Let me break it down for you friends, since my head very often spins about this as well. I mean seriously this is ridiculous .  In a mostly able bodied or  healthy  world there is a large segment of our society that believe with all their hearts and minds that those of us with disabilities or illnesses are unable to understand or tell our own stories.   I am apparently too disabled for my thoughts and opinions to matter on my  life in general.  I am also accused being too capable to speak on issues related to being a disabled person.  Now honestly I don’t care what other people think I am or should be.  If I don’t know a person to do more then smile or nod as we pass ... their opinion does not matter.  I’ve always been that weird person who will gladly get on stage and perform.  I loved any public speaking opportunity I’ve ever had.  I put myself out there on the internet and talk about things a lot of people won’t touch with a ten foot poll.  I don’t give strangers opinions  of my life or my disability or my service dog  much space in my brain.  But I will admit to giving a little bit of thought to the idea that uninformed people need to pick a direction.  What is it that they want from me?  Education is one thing but as a friend recently pointed out some uniformed people hold very tightly to their beliefs and that’s how they want it.  I honestly have had an epiphany lately.  Life is to short and I have too many things to do and too many kind and interested people in my life who want to have conversations that matter.  But I am still me and so I did think about how I would have liked to respond in each case.  Being a disabled person out in public can be  physically exhausting .  Not to mention the emotionally taxing part that is constantly having to deal with people who feel you must justify your right to live your life in a way that works for you.  Keep in mind my friends that I don’t mean that I feel the need to attend every interaction I am invited to.  But as a person who does not blend into the background. I am sometimes forced into conversations I would not have otherwise.  I hope the  the fancy scooter with glitter stickers and big amazing friendly yellow lab send the message that I’m  not really worried about how well I blend .  Some people though feel the need to tell me what they know about me.  Sometimes the stop me in public to tell me what I should wear, how I should.conduct my business, what a real “helping”  dog does, or how I should spend my money.  That’s just a small list of what I and others with disabilities hear.  Because people  feel  secure in the knowledge that they know us  and have the right to tell us  things. As if I a disabled person am fair game just by daring to be in their presence.  Sometimes I attended those arguments and sometimes I don’t   Depends on my day and my mood. Of course some people get louder and angrier if I leave a conversation before they are done telling me about myself.
What I am reminded of most days is that that says more about the people who behave that way then it does about me or any of us with disabilities but that knowledge is little comfort in the moment.    So if you don’t like the way I tell MY story then you probably shouldn’t read it.  In fact instead of making comments or sending me messages  about how my way is wrong. Why not get out there and tell your own story.  If someone’s only goal is to try and make someone else feel bad about themselves they will  clearly will find me annoyingly positive.  Or perhaps it will bother them that I’m not angry or depressed or striving to be  more “normal”  For those people I’m not sure what it is about me or the way I tell my story that makes them squirm so much they feel justified in trying to tell me how I need to do me.   And honestly except for the minute  in which I am having to deal with that person and or their comment. I don’t care   The most horrible thing I can do in the minds of people who approach me in this way is to ignore them entirely.  I’’ll  keep my mostly positive attitude.  I’ll continue to fight against the. “amazing inspirational disabled person”  that these kinds of people want to be my one and only job. I’d be terrible at that by the way I complain way too much  .Because really now who has time for that pressure.  I’ll leave the inspiring to people who feel comfortable in that role and can handle that pressure with grace. My friends never ever let anyone tell you  how to tell your stories or how to be your true self.        

Keep doing you 🐾💚😊

When in doubt trust your dog! They know things.

Hello my friends,

  Pull up a chair and lets talk about emotions,  So many emotions This past Saturday was official graduation from Susquehanna Service Dogs Team Training.  It had everything you’d expect from a celebration of this kind, I  started crying when the email came that told us how the process would go.  Honestly I’ve cried  a lot since Scout came into my life.  But wait, before you decide this blog is going to be too sad and stop reading, let me explain why.  Since my email came 4 years ago that said Hey we’ve got your application and we’d like to set up an interview.  I’ve been holding  my breath so to speak.  As readers of this blog will know I started the process right after my previous dog died.  I was conflicted about getting a new dog.  What if the bond was different what if I didn’t feel the same way about a new dog as I had about Nikki?  So many ridiculous ways the brain messes with you.   Cue all kinds of emotions. Then of course as is always a fact of my of my life, how in the world was I going to get there.  It’s about an hour from here and I thought if I tell them I can’t get there ... they are probably going to tell me they have a huge list and they can’t help me.  I took an appointment a good distance enough away in time that I thought I’d be able to arrange rides.  But it didn’t work out that way.  Even though I was willing to pay for my rides none of the people I usually hire were available.  So just as I was about to call and see if I could reschedule I got a Facebook message. (Not kidding at that exact moment. In fact I almost didn’t check it cause I was nervous about having to call)  My friend Brenda messaged to say she and her husband (whom I don’t believe I’d met until he drove me to Grantville ) said they’d discussed it and felt they were supposed to help me get to my interview. Usually I would wonder why but I so glad to be able to get there I didn’t over think it.  I got to my interview and my friends got an inside view at how the SSD process works as they came on this entire journey with me  I  am so lucky to have in my circle and now Scout’s too.
    Fast forward to September of last year when the email came that said “ Come meet some dogs.”  I was again worried about rides but it was actually fairly simple this time thanks to  roommate’s mom who was super excited to see the process from the inside. She’s an all around dog person. So then I thought what if I have to do a meet the dogs more then once .... sometimes that happens. No I refused to think about that for long. I was nervous and excited  a lot had changed for me since that first interview I’d finished college. I was living with my roommate’s tiny rather high strung dog.  Yes lots had changed, I wondered if I would still be a good fit for their program.  But I knew at this point I was ready for a new furry friend.  And then they brought sweet Scout into the room. I met four dogs that day.  But really truly I only remember Scout because well honestly, I don’t know why I knew, but I knew he was was just the one for me.  I have since learned that when Scout really likes someone he wants belly rubs from them.  I have seen it many times in the short time we’ve been partners.  My roommate calls him Scout the puddle  It’s a fairly accurate description of what he does  When he came into the room the first thing he did was melt into the floor so I could rub his belly.  A sign to everyone in the room but me that maybe this was a match.  I left that meeting and waited a long week to find out if  I had been matched and seriously my only thought when I found out I’d matched  was I hope it’s Scout.  There were tears then even though I didn’t know which dog yet.  I told three people about my meet the dogs experience and if you asked any of them they’d tell you I  really only talked about Scout.  SSD does not tell you who you matched with until a week or so before team training starts because if something comes up and your match didn’t work out that would be difficult for everybody.
 When the email came informing me I had matched with Scout there were tears the minute I saw his picture.. I’m an emotional person.  In case perhaps you aren’t getting the very obvious point that emotions of any kind bring tears. Then it came time for team training the planning of which, for me was seriously stress inducing but I was very clear that I was going to work out the ridiculous transportation  issues (more in a future blog).  Because I was going to make this work no matter what I needed to do.  The point for today’s story is what seemed like an insurmountable problem was worked out.  So the first time I saw Scout after 5 months or so of waiting between meet the dogs and team training we were both nervous and I thought he didn’t like me.  When I tried to touch him he backed away a tiny bit. Someone suggested I try a different approach and treats and it worked, but  I kind of thought either he really does not like me or he really doesn’t want to be a service dog.  I thought that pretty much the whole first week.  But there was no way I was going to say that to anyone. Then we spent the weekend alone in a tiny hotel room responsible totally to each other and only with  each other for company.  He was always a sweet dog, a calm dog, a gentle dog, and he was very interested in checking me out. But I wasn’t sure he wanted to be with me and I wanted him to be happy.  So I thought well maybe we’ll just hang out in the hotel hallway. We  didn’t  public have access rights yet. And the weather was pretty terrible.  We were basically stuck at the hotel where SSD dogs have permission to be while they are in training.  Partners can go home every day or stay.  With my transportation issues staying in Grantville was easiest. But we both were kind of bored all weekend.   One can only watch so much television  So I took him out in a mostly empty hall and we walked.up and down the hall.  Me pushing my wheelchair to lean on the same way I use my walker and him doing his best heel.  Just to practice our basics  and suddenly and without warning I was on the floor.  It happens.  CP is like that.  I didn’t get hurt but I remember thinking if he runs I’ll know he doesn’t want to be MY service dog at least.. At this point I was sitting against a wall trying to figure how to get up as quickly as possible so no one would see. It was not graceful and people freak out when adults fall.  No matter how many times you say you are okay Scout was momentarily perplexed, looked me over and came and laid beside me while I worked out how to get up   I was impressed that he laid down so quickly and then when I was up and sitting in my wheelchair he came over and put his head in my lap.  And that’s when I knew this is fine.  We’re gonna be fine, we both just need to give it time and I need to relax.  He’s  a wonderful dog.  But I don’t  want anyone who reads this to think it was easy  Training wasn’t easy for us. Dogs are thinking creatures and they have there own ideas,   So some days he was a rock star and some days he just wasn’t into it.  Some days we were both tired.  It’s intense.  It took me a while to figure out how to get him excited about doing what I asked .  Even though Kara (his primary trainer) explained many times how he likes the happy  voice  and encouragement. I struggled because that wasn’t my natural state. It felt so silly to use that tone but it worked every time I could get past feeling ridiculous  Thank goodness the  staff and volunteers  are patient positive people . Kara took some of her own time on the weekend to help us learn to work together and to assure me I wasn’t going to undo all his traiing because we weren’t quite there yet. I was sure I would “break” him. I went home at the end of training  feeling we’d get there with time  And  knowing if I have questions the staff and volunteers at Susquehanna Service Dogs have our backs.  We are getting there.  We are  learning together.  I will gladly throw him a party in public when he ‘s doing well with without a second thought because it’s about us getting through things together. Plus he’s so proud when he gets that party that I have stopped worrying about looking goofy.  He’s such a happy goofy dog.  He wants to be a service dog. He loves his job.  I know this with a certainty that I can’t really explain to most people.  I gained an entire amazing  group of people who want as to do well .  Friends from class, the trainers the staff and volunteers.  All of Scout’s people, who were invested in him before I was even in the picture.  All these people will do anything they can to help us succeed  and Scout and I would do the same for any of them. .  I certainly didn’t expect to gain a whole new family as part of this process but in a sense when you are partnered with an SSD dog that’s what you get. Now of course each person and partner team gets to choose how much involvement they want to have going forward.  But in the right circumstances those bonds can be intense just like the team training itself.  Scout loves all his people with an intensity that only a dog can and I wouldn’t be doing right by him in my view if I didn’t continue to share our journey with them.  Scout by the way is from the Girl Scout liter and 4 of his siblings are working service dogs now as well.  That’s a wow number my friends.
  As I looked back on all of that as we graduated  I realized how much  we’d both come through to get to that point and I know we will continue grow as a team as time goes on.  I know that this was just how it was supposed to be.  Everyone who had supported me was there and I got lots of picture to share with all of my friends and loved ones who had donated to make this a reality.  There are plenty of reason for tears and emotion and not one of those reasons is sad.  Please check out the links at the top of the page to learn about  SSD’s capital campaign and find out how you can help them continue their mission to bring more dogs like Scout to more people who need them because dogs can change lives.

“He’s great and all but what does Scout really do for you”

Hello my friends.

Happy Monday, I hope you are all looking forward into a good week.  Let’s jump right in shall we, as the the title suggests people are always asking me what Scout  does for me.
This is the question that I get most often and in all of it’s various forms. From the ridiculous “ but you aren’t that handicapped why do you NEED a dog?” To the well thought out “ Now what is the purpose of your service dog?”  From a medical person after an appointment.  So I could make this post about the all the amazing things Scout does and leave it at that but Friends I want you to understand not only what he does but also why.  Because knowledge is power.  First I’m going to tell you a little bit more about who Scout is, not just what he does.  If you read the last blog some of this will be a bit of repeat but who he is — is part of what he does for me and how he does it. Scout is a two and half year old yellow Labrador.  He’s a big dog he weighs around 66 lbs.  He is the calmest and most gentle  go with the flow chill dog I have ever met.  He’s a mobility service dog which means (for us) that he/we were trained to work together when I am using my mobility devices.  Most often my scooter or wheelchair but he also helps me when I am using my walker or just walking around my house. He loves working.  He gets super excited when I ask for his help.  Like really really excited.  So we never want people to think he isn’t really happy to be a working dog.  He loves his job and we are pretty attached to each other.  He loves peanut butter, and mealtimes.  He likes fetch and tug of war.  A good belly rub and also a nice nap.  People who see us together sometimes think he’s sad or in some sort of distress because he moves so slowly.  He’s not sad at all he moves slow and is super calm because that’s 1 his personality and 2 that makes him the perfect partner for me.  I just don’t move very quickly.  Most things we do have to be thought out and planned.  If I’m using my scooter or walker and he moved fast I could fall and we both could get hurt.  When he’s having playtime his default playing mode is running so fast he trips over his back feet and barking a lot.  Think about it this way  if you went to work at your office job and ran around yelling and bouncing you’d probably be asked to leave.  It’s the same for a service dog team we have to under control and seamless at all times.  The best compliment a team can get is “oh I didn’t know there was a dog here”.   He gets plenty of time to be his goofy playful self but working in public isn’t the time for him to be running around and acting goofy.  He knows when he’s in harness he is working.   For me the biggest task Scout performs is picking up the various things I drop,  When I have to bend down and pick something up there is a good chance that I will end up on the floor too.  It’s just a fact of what CP looks like for me.  His willingness to do this task over and over again and be super happy about it means not only do I fall less but I have more energy to use in my day.  People with CP use a lot more energy just doing basic daily tasks, like taking a shower, or cleaning the kitchen.  So having Scout to help me do errands and chores means I can do more in my day,  Because he does a lot of the bending over and picking up that exhausted me before.  Scout can open doors and close them for me.  We have several special ropes and other adaptive equipment that allow us to do that safely together.  One of those things is a plastic hook with a ribbon on one side for him to help me with doors in public,  It’s portable and lightweight and he carries it for me in his harness so we always have it with us,  It’s meant I’ve been places that I’d stopped going when I couldn’t pull the door open and drive the scooter or push my walker through at the same time.   He can push buttons for me so he can open doors that require pushing a button to have them open,   It’s helpful because honestly sometimes it takes two hands to keep my balance or wrangle the tiny humans and in that case he’s an extra hand for me that works better then both my legs.  He can pull my laundry basket (again with a special rope for his safety) down the hall saving me energy to actually do the wash.  I can move this rope to other things and he can help me move other big or heavy things saving me all kinds of effort and energy.  He carries a small bag with things in it.  Something I discovered quite by accident the other day and it’s really helpful if I need to pick up a lot of little stuff at once.  He can help pick things up put them in the bag and then carry the things to the place they belong allowing me to focus on staying upright when I walk because I have to think about every step or I will fall.  So those are just a few of the things Scout does to help me daily. And why those things are so important to me living my best life.  I am so appreciative of the things he does for me that I make sure he is also living his best life.
He’s a sweet goofy dog who loves to snuggle and play and gets lots of time to do that.  But he also is a very people loving working dog and he gets lots of attention when we’re are in public together.  The thing people say to us most often is “Wow your dog sure looks happy.”  I really believe he’s happiest when he’s getting praise and love for all the amazing skills he has.  One of the misconceptions out there is that service animals are forced to work for people.  Let me tell you something Scout and other dogs like him only work because they want to.  Service dogs choose this work.  We all watch them all the time to make sure they still enjoy doing it.  If it ever was to stop being fun they’d definitely let their person know.  I am so lucky to have Scout in my life.
  Susquehanna Service Dogs is currently having a capital campaign to raise money for more/better facilities to allow them to continue their work,  And to bring more amazing dogs like Scout to more people with disabilities.  Scout has added so much to my life in just the short time we’ve been a team that I didn’t get to in this blog,  My wish would be for every person with a disability who wants service dog to have the option of getting one.  The money SSD is trying to raise will in enable them to change more lives   Check out the link  watch the video and consider sharing and donating if you can.  To find out more about Susquehanna Service. Dogs and how you can help follow the links at the top of my blog.  The link to the capital campaign is directly above Scout’s pictures.  Thanks for being interested friends and remember to keep doing you!  🐾💚
https://www.crowdrise.com/o/en/campaign/susquehanna-capital-campaign
#dogschangelives

So Much to Process

Hello Friends
First let me say I never meant to go this long without posting and I did have every intention of blogging through team training.  But to be honest I wasn’t prepared for the emotional or physical exhaustion that comes along with receiving the dog that had waited and planned for, for so long.  I have a lot to say about the process but I’m going to start with what’s been going on since  we came home.  Because when I talk about training I want to get it right so I’m going to start with how I’m feeling and how Scout is adjusting to being a working dog 24/7.  It’s been just a few days over a month since we came home.  When I met Scout during my meet the dogs back in September of  last year, I was really set on him.   You can ask anyone with whom I was sharing details (those people were few). But they would tell you that when I came back from that meet the dogs with all kinds of emotions about Scout.  The first thing I remember noticing is that he was huge.  I’ve never really had a big dog before.  He had the biggest feet and the softest fur.  For his part, the first thing that he did when he saw me was roll over so I could give him belly rubs. His tail going a mile a minute.  He had laid down just a little bit too far from me, for me to reach and so one of the staff slid him a little closer and whole time his tail was going as though he’d never been happier in life.  Right then I was hooked on this dog and even though I met several others that day and said any of them would be great, if I was being honest all I really thought about was his sweet face.   Of course I couldn’t know time that he had also decided on me.
One of the things SSD emphasizes is the bonding process and so I really wanted things to go well and honestly I wasn’t sure he wanted to be around me or wanted me to touch him during training I was actually pretty sure he hated me. Unless I had food.  (Hint I really needed to relax).   More on that later  There was so much going on and so much to do and to learn that I sort of forgot that for awhile.Staff kept telling me they could see how much he wanted to be around me and how closely he would watch me or wait for me.  But it took me a few days before I could see it too.
   So here’s what I’ve learned about my buddy and my partner in crime.  He is the goofiest most about relaxed  and gentle creature I’ve ever met. He’s very serious about his job but also willing to go at my pace.  He is 67 lbs of snuggles. He wants to be as close to me as he can get almost all the time.  He loves belly rubs and peanut butter. He’s a people dog and especially loves an audience when we are out and about living the service dog partners life.  I worried in the first few days that he woulsn’t be able to relax.  After all I was asking him to come and live with me and leave everyone he knew.  I worried that I and he would forget everything we’d learned   Because I worried I woulsb’t praxtice with him enough or too much. He came in here and just accepted that this is home.  No worries no issues.  My roommate has a dog who was less sure about him.  But now they are buddies . So my biggest lesson in all of this has been to Chill the heck out.  In other words take a page from dear sweet Scout and relax a bit.    As soon as I relaxed about things we started to click..  Understand that if you are in the process of a journey to a service dog, the dog you will find will steal your heart and will be well trained and well mannered but it takes time for you to get used to each other even when the connection is there.  It’s like getting a new roommate.  You may feel like it will work well and you will get a long great but there is still an adjustment period.  We;’ve been together about 2 months in total and just in the last 2 weeks or so we’re starting to read each other.  Know that it is always going to be a work in progress   But I knew it would be worth back in September when we first met.   More to come next week 💚🐾💜😊

Keeping it real.

Hello my friends,

I have a blog on some more service dog thoughts coming hopefully by Monday but friends I feel like we need to talk about something else.  So bonus blog today, last week I posted on facebook about needing a new battery for my scooter.  I share certain aspects of life with my cerebral palsy because I feel it’s important for people who don’t travel in this circle or know anyone who does to understand what an experience of disability life can look like.  I can only speak to my own experience of course.  But there are some things that so many people I know also experience that I have decided to use myself as an example.  So back to the scooter battery.  As you all know I am heading off to service dog  training in just a few weeks.  There are a lot of things I need to do in order to prepare for this.  One of the first was to make sure my wheels are in tip top shape.  Once a year I have to replace the batteries and it gets the once over to make sure everything is working as it should.  This costs around $300 as long as all it needs are batteries. It is an expense I budget for.  I share this because when I mentioned it in passing I got ridiculously opinionated emails/messages from people who feel they know something about my life and finances enough to say things like If you can’t get your scooter fixed what makes you think you should be asking hard working people to support your service dog?   Why don’t you just get a job instead of asking strangers for money?  Now I put myself out there in the hopes of spreading awareness for people who are interested .  So I have come to expect and understand that the uninformed see me as a target and that it brings them some kind of pleasure to cut me down.  (Also I am not sure where these lovely people got the idea I wasn’t going to pay for the “repairs”)   Fine whatever, I don’t give two shakes what the nameless hoard of keyboard warriors thinks of me,  But I thought we should talk about the bigger picture.  When you or your loved one has a disability there are just expenses that you must deal with that most people without disability experience don’t think about.  I’m actually fairly lucky. My health is otherwise good, I don’t require lots of extra adaptive equipment or extra medical intervention right now.  I don’t require a ton assistance to go about my day to day life when things are accessible. And my service dog will help a lot with my physical struggles.  Making it possible for me do more.  Hopefully allowing me to go further  in a day because he will help me to save energy.  Right now one big task such as  cleaning my house requires most of my physical energy. I can definitely do that but constant bending  over to lets say pick up something that’s dropped on the floor or spilling something in the kitchen that’s going to require multiple steps to clean up will be all I can physically do in one day. I am grateful for my ability to walk ,and bend to pick something up.  But bending over too often or too far will mean falling   I am able  get my house to certain level of clean to walk up and down a fight stairs if I absolutely need to no matter how slowly I may have to do those things. But it’s not that way for everyone.  I have friends who need assistance with all of those things and more for themselves or their child,  Contrary to what these keyboard warriors seem to think there is no magic fairy of disability that pays for all the equipment. Insurance doesn’t pay for it very often either.  Now imagine you have a child with a disability and she outgrows her equipment.  All of her doctors and therapist that you likely pay for out pocket, because she needs more therapy then your insurance says she can have , agree she needs the new equipment  in order to live her best life.  But when you as her parent or her doctor tell the insurance company that’s what she needs they say sorry but she had a new one six months ago and its not time  Then what??  You sit down with that child and tell her she must not grow for a year? There’s no office of magical accessibility fairies to build us that ramp, or make the bathroom in our houses accessible either.  No one pays our bills. What we need to make our lives manageable, to do the things non disabled people do without a second thought, is very often financially unattainable.   I don’t know where so many people have gotten this idea that we are all independently wealthy or that that magic money tree shows up with your person with a disability card.  Please note my sarcasm intended in the last sentence.  In my case I have a college degree, and good grades that I am proud of.  What I don’t have as yet is a  job that will allow me to use my skills or pay me for the use of my skills.  People think I am awesome and inspiring but they can’t see past  the scooter or the way I walk in order to see what I bring to the table. Again I’m lucky because I can work given the correct environment and the right open minded people.  But what if you can’t because your disability prevents it.  Or your child needs that kind of care you can’t find anyone to provide. Attendant care isn’t free. Specialized care for children or adults who need is often ridiculously expensive.  That computer program that talks to you so you can use the internet and send emails  so that you can continue to work that or the really great hearing aid that lets you know when your kid’s needs you from another room or when the dog is barking to go out, is so expensive that you can’t even dream about those things.  Even if you find you can get some help you have to jump through all kinds of hoops to get it.  And if you or your family is able to jump through those hoops and  is getting help that could change at any time with little or no notice.  So many of us resort to fund raising in various ways to get what we need. It’s not easy to ask, we know there will be judgments, most of us are ok with that because we also know that the people who matter already know the truth.  I will do whatever I need to do to live my best most independent life without shame.  I hope to some day be able to support someone else in the myriad of ways I have been suooirted through out my life.   That is part of all the reason I do what I do.  I hope dear friends, the next time you hear someone making that judgemental comment  you will remember what I’ve shared,  Thank you so very much for the continued support of my journey toward a service dog.  Time is flying.  I’ve gotten so much support and I am grateful.  If you want to know obout my service dog journey or fundraising efforts please see the links at the top of the blog. Feel free to get in touch if you have questions and you can find me on Instagram/Twitter  @mobilitydiva  Or on facebook same name as the blog.  Keep doing you!💚🐾

Journey to a new Friend part 2. There is no handbook for this!

Wow keeping up with this blogging thing can be hard.  Some days I’m very motivated to write and the day just seems to get away from me.  I hope that those of you that are celebrating holidays this month are enjoying time with people you want to be with.  If for you that means time with Netflix I can totally relate to that too. I don’t live terribly close to my family so I usually hang out with friends on Thanksgiving and plan my trip home for about a week at Christmas. So I will be going home on Thursday and I couldn’t be more excited about seeing my nephews. We FaceTime and talk on the phone fairly often and my sister and brother in law keep me up to date on all the new things they are doing but we haven’t been in the same room since last Christmas.  (Thank goodness for face time!!!). Sometime around the end  October I sent my 4 and a half and 2 and a half  year old nephews a box filled with Halloween Goodies.( if you have littles in your life you know how important the half is.)
     Also in the box was a book telling the story of a little boy getting a mobility service dog.  I really want the boys to be as involved in this journey with me as much as they would like to be My sister explained to my older nephew that I would be getting a dog like the one in the book and some of the things that we all hope the new dog will be able to help me with.  We are collectively trying to ease them both into the concept.  So when he heard I was coming for Christmas he wanted to know if I was bringing the dog.  I have talked with my sister about ways that I plan to include him in the next part of the journey.  He seems pretty interested and that’s super fun for me.  Family and friends support is a very important piece of this in my opinion.  Because keeping it real here if I didn’t have that support I might let my brain which is prone to go places I have never given it permission to go anyway, take over and  low and behold I fall down the proverbial Alice in Wonderland type hole.  You know, where  I can’t see the bottom and nothing really makes sense. Some of you I’m sure can identify with this.   The first dog a person is totally responsible for teaches them things be that dog a pet or a working dog, about themselves .  So right now here are my chief thoughts about the continuing journey to a new service dog partner.  I keep having these dreams about Nikki.  No one told me that this journey would be so emotional.  I think about her constantly.  It doesn’t make me sad, but I’m a crier so happy or sad ... cute dogs on tv, other people’s service dog videos, I’m there and it makes me cry.  I’m going with this must be normal.  (For me)  Then there are the more practical things.  If all goes well.  I will start bringing the dog home in early February, when training begins.  I am nervous.  No one tells you about the nerves either.  It’s been quite a few years since I had to take care of a dog .  We are starting this new adventure in the middle of winter.  So that means bundling up and braving the chill which my body hates way more than it used too, because my new friend will need to go out for exercise and other things.  I’m of course willing to do whatever needs to be done and I whole heartedly believe that it will go well,  But it will be an an adjustment for both of us.  My roommate has a sweet snuggly jack russel mix.  We’ve discussed at length how to handle their adjustment to each other.  SSD knows all about her of course. I talked all about her in my meet the dogs session.  She likes other dogs and we think they will be buddies after that new roommate adjustment period.  We think they will keep each other entertained.  Perhaps  the silliest but somehow very real concern is what if my new friend really just decides he doesn’t like me.  I can hear you laughing. But wait hear me out.  I had an amazing bond with Nikki and even though that sometimes caused unforeseen issues, most of it I wouldn’t change.  I liked that I was her person and she liked that she was my dog.  I know this will come with time, and every relationship is different even with our dogs.  But there is a small part of me that worries a little bit that he will not like me.  Which in more adult terms means I am concerned about the bonding process.    I share all of this with you to help you understand that I think all of my feelings are normal. (For the most part)   Most of the time I am super excited that this is coming soon.  But I know some people who read my blog are in other parts of the service dog process, or with other programs and maybe this will help some of them to know whatever they feel is okay too.  New phases in life are exciting and nerve wracking because we just cannot know what we do not know yet.  Remember what I’ve said about how important  the support system is.  For me, in this phase of my life, that’s mostly been my sister.  I told her some of this and she listened and then said, “ I hear you and I understand.  But If you weren’t a little nervous I’d be more surprised.”  And after some more thought I’ve  decided to focus on excited for now.  Because my friends in a little more than a month and a half I’ll know who I matched with as long as everything goes according to plan.  Thanks to all you for your continuing support.  Please check out the links at the top of the blog to learn more about Susquehanna Service dogs or my continuing fund raising efforts.
And Remember to Keep Doing You. 💚