Happy Weekend my friends,
Today I thought I’d give you some insight into what my brain is filled with right now so buckle up. Three years ago right after the passing of my previous dog (Nikki) I began the long process to be matched with a Susquehanna Service dog. I was in no way ready for a new dog. I was just starting to go out again. Here’s the thing about the passing of a service dog, there’s no break from the grief. Loosing a pet is also devastating there is no denying that but when you loose a service dog everyone you know and lots of people you don’t, will ask where your dog is everywhere you go. I had to be ready for that. Then when you finally get to the place where you can say she died, without being an emotional mess, everyone who asks feels terrible for asking. Because I am who I am, and I didn’t want them to feel bad. I tried to comfort the people who asked. Everyone was trying to be so kind. But right than it really isn’t the time to tell your own loss of a pet story, because then we were both sad. When I was home my house that wasn’t usually quiet even when I was alone is suddenly so quiet. Too quiet. My amazing friends brought their dogs. Many of them didn’t ask they just came. I thought that would be terrible idea but it wasn’t. Dogs are amazingly intuitive creatures and I believe they know when we are hurting. So my friends bringing their pets and in one case another service dog was just what I needed. At the time my mom commented on the wave of support that I got and how many lives Nikki had touched. Even I was bowled over by people who reached out to tell me stories of meeting us that I didn’t remember. Nikki’s death wasn’t all that sudden. She had a chronic illness that she and I had managed all of her life with varying degrees of success and amazing vet care. She loved her job and had a long great life. (My dad often said he wanted to come back as an animal in my or my sister’s life. Because we are those cat/dog parents) That’s what I told people over and over again for weeks and months afterwords and I believe it.
In any case, I was torn because I needed to grieve but the service dog matching process takes a long time for most people. So two weeks after Nikki died I began again. In the interest of honesty it felt pretty terrible, the mind plays tricks on you Because I was missing her I felt as if filling out the papers and thinking of having a new dog in the future was disloyal. It’s not but the brain and the heart argue about these things sometimes. It took me awhile to finish the application. I pushed through because I knew eventually that I would have space in my life and heart for a new dog. Nikki was owner trained so the process of getting a dog through Susquehanna Service Dogs was different. I filled out forms about my lifestyle, my apartment, my cerebral palsy and the things it made difficult, and the types of things I was hoping to see in my future service dog’s personality. It reminded me of an old style college application, with a roommate survey. Even up to and including a small application fee. It all came in a thick envelope and was more than a little overwhelming.
The second step in this process is an in person interview. But the timing for that depended at least partially on me. SSD needs to get all your paper work back so they can review it before they decide if someone is a good fit for their program. They also ask for personal references. The questions on those forms basically relate to how well the people I chose thought I could care for a service dog and the benefits they saw to me having a service dog as part of my life. The tricky part for me about the references was I didn’t get to know what they said. My job was just to send them the paperwork and not to think about it. That was HARD. Then if everything goes as planned they schedule an interview. That happened at the end of summer. I had some very gracious friends split up their own work days to help me get to Susquehanna Service Dogs. It’s a little over an hour from here. This is when I got meet with a group of the staff. It’s really like a detailed getting to know you session. They went over all the application paperwork, asked for details in some places and brought up other things I hadn’t as yet thought through. They asked about my support system. It’s super important that one has a support system because it’s kind of a stressful process and I wanted and still want the people in my circle to know my new dog as well as many of them knew Nikki ( Clearly when you have friends who take half day’s so you don’t miss your interview you have great support.) My friend Dave got to sit in on the interview with me. We both learned a ton. They talked about what to expect and explained as gently as they could that there is a waiting list and in my particular case, because of specific things I needed in a dog it might take the full three years. Right then I was fine with that. Because on that day I couldn’t imagine having another dog. I was a college student. Nikki had her share of health issues that at times wore me out. Plus I couldn’t imagine ever being bonded to another dog that way. So a nice long cooling off and healing period seemed just right.
After this meeting both Dave and I got to meet some new puppies. All the SSD puppies have themes to their names. So we met the Cheese litter (all the names were based on a kind of cheese). I sat in the enclosure and someone put a puppy in my lap. That’s when I met Parmigiano who promptly fell asleep . She snored so loud that her little body just vibrated and she slept with her tongue out. Puppy hugging is definitely in order for a healing heart. Parm, by the way has gone on to be an amazing service dog with her partner Chris. I follow her adventures on facebook. Many of the Susquehanna Service dogs in various stages of training have their own pages. If you are on facebook check them out. She has a special place in my heart because in a sense I’ve gotten to watch her whole journey and it helped to imagine my own. If you want to learn more about the program or my fundraising efforts check out the links at the top of the page.
Part 2 coming next week friends. Until then thanks for your amazing and continuing support.. Remember to Keep doing You. 💚
